MCO 3.0

Our country reactivates the MCO 3.0 following the spike of COVID-19 recently. The number hits 4k daily which is quite worrying to us. Browsing thru our photos taken last year when everyone was required to stay home, the new normal hasn't changed this year- we are still home. It all began when the kids started to go to school then a few new cases found where the children got it from the family members. There were some cases in Xuan and Cheng's school, including Xuan's class. The government's instruction was clear that the classes involved would be quarantined at home for 10 days and the children would study online. However, the chain effect was large because we decided to quarantine ourselves- Cheng and XY too. So, my stress level has been on the rise since then.

Since early of the year, the number of the cases has been increasing where it got hubby and me paranoid. We went for the test even for mild case of cough and sore throat. That was in January this year. Last month, I went for the second test again after I got notification on MySejahtera app being one of the casual contacts because the premise I went was visited by the COVID-19 patient on the same day, at the same time I checked-in. Similarly, Xuan also went for his swab test after the classmate tested positive. 

The virus is horrific that most of us feel stressed being confined at home. While it may be a blessing in disguise for my family since I'm still on study leave, I would not know how to deal with it when I go back to work few months later. 

On a side note, I have gained quite a lot of weight since the first MCO. I felt myself so heavy that I decided to do some workouts. It is one of the things that I'm proud of doing it throughout my study leave although I just get it started in February this year. I'm still lazy to make it my lifestyle and I doubt I will continue to do so when I go back to work. But wish me luck. I just have to keep going.   

走过2020，迎接2021

时间基本上过得不算太快，长时间埋怨2020，MCO的新常态，让我郁闷，甚至有些时候还有点窒息。问我2020做过什么，我有点答不出来。宅在家潜水吧！难得有这种机会“相夫教子”，可是教没两下，我血压飙升了。百年一遇啊，应该好好记着跟孩子的每一分，每一秒呢！回首2020，我想起很多时候的身不由己。陪小瓜上网课从最初的新鲜感，到后来的烦躁，再到后来的好自为之，一切随缘，我算是看破了吧。陪太子读书真不容易呀，仿佛自己又回到了幼儿园、置身于小学。监督3个小瓜做功课更是难上加难了，我是一个头两个大，因为功课是3个人的、各自又有很多不同的科目，那些孩子遗漏的，我得一一记下，之后提醒了再敦促、然后再检查。2020年3月18号开启的MCO 1.0刚好落在学校假期，本来应该开学的时候，学校却关闭了。网上教学其实也没有怎么真正的开始，大家却争相的给功课，有点乱水了，苦了我这个做妈的。当初日子怎么过的？好像每天都上演母子吵架的戏码，一个用藤鞭像母老虎一样的喊打喊杀，一个动不动就想离家出走的家伙，后来的我们抱着一起哭，然后就慢慢地习惯了人人口中的新常态。功课要是做了、线上补习也上了、你可以玩你的充气游泳池，我继续看我的小说。这画面每天都不断的重复再重复。7月22号的开学日，大家都是忐忑的。孩子难免有点伤感，可是日子总归要继续的。他们对我这个妈是感激不尽了。返校后，老师把MCO期间的功课重新温习一遍，同学们需要回家做功课的时候，那两兄弟在家尽情的玩耍，只因为功课早在MCO期间完成了。之后的10月12号，学校又开始关闭了。那一次学校做足了准备功夫。除了校外的线上补习，学校规定一天一个小时的网课来得真是太好了。主科和副科的功课也分配得很到位，我想应该很多家长会像我一样，喜欢这种安排。听着老师线上教学，我很讶异！先不说要学着新的教学方法以掌控学生的集中能力，避免孩子闷的慌，单是要控制班上30-40名学生已经不简单了，还有那些一年级的，老师我要上厕所，老师要4点半了，为什么还没有下课，等等，这压力也真够大！到后来年尾假期开始了，我决定让孩子好好休息，给予他们我和老公小时候记忆中的假期，那就是24/7在父母身边，没有补习，不用上课，睡醒了就吃，吃饱了再玩，天亮玩到天黑。同时也属于我自己的假期。于是，我们回去了吉兰丹一趟。踏入新的一年，学校假期结束后，国家又开启了MCO 2.0，孩子还是一样没机会重返校园。

新的一年，网课从一天一个小时变成了一天两个小时。儿子已经习惯性地自动自发开启电脑做功课，上网课。那两个家伙没有很专心，有的时候一边上课一边聊天，有的时候电脑前坐着就缩成了一团，也有一些常常找机会下来喝水。线上教学专注力有限，没办法了。到最后检查作业的那部分还是少不了的。这时妹妹的幼儿园也重开了。为了公平起见，我们献议妹妹上半天的课。由于我有睡眠障碍，没有这么早起，老公就载她上学，我负责接她回家。大家皆大欢喜！

这样的新常态，我还学了些什么吗？刚开始的MCO，我下厨的频率是很高的，到后来偷懒了，负责准备食材，让老公来煮是常常发生的状况。有时候打包，很多时候去妈妈那里蹭饭，没办法，天生不是厨房的料。最喜欢的就是，老公说你准备好了材料放着，我放工后下来煮。更喜欢妈妈打包好的菜肴，我把它冷藏。想吃时，弄烧就可以了，然后炒一样菜、煲个汤，一餐就这样解决了。这种情况多数是晚餐，午餐很多时候是简单的米粉、炒面、意大利面等。这次的MCO 2.0，更是直接叫外卖，太累了。不是累在准备食材，而是累在太费心思。每一餐该吃什么，是西餐还是中餐，西餐是粉、汉堡、披萨还是快餐，中餐是面还是饭，面是什么面，干还是湿，饭又要配什么菜肴，孩子吃不吃等，都变成了我该考量的问题，所以就一个字—累，压力比山大。

昨天政府公布孩子3月起要重返校园了。孩子应该不会很开心吧，那3个小瓜在家的时间太享受了，除了课业，有看不厌的卡通，从bugs bunny到ultraman，还有吃不玩的零食。趁着我还没重返职场，大家尽情的享受吧！我的硕士课程也已经走到了尾端。有机会重返校园，再尝试网课，这感觉太奇妙了，心里总是装着满满的感恩。不像有些人从德国回来已经习惯了work from home, 所谓在家工作的新常态也不过尔尔。

年初九了，新年新希望，愿大家幸福美满，一年过得比一年好。

MCO

It’s been more than two weeks since the movement control order (mco) started to avoid the outbreak of covid-19. While people have been saying that the mco allows more quality time with kids at home, I’m feeling so burned out with so much house chores, particularly cooking and monitoring homework. On the other hand, I’m feeling grateful that this is happening when I’m on study leave. I wouldn’t know how to manage all these if I’m still at work, coming home to cook and watching the kids complete their homework.

So the schools and tuition centre made it another level by having online classes. It’s the efforts from the teachers that we appreciate a lot. The first week of mco collided with school holiday so the kids were merely spending their time playing paddling pool and watching tv. Soon, we got messages from the teachers telling the kids to complete their activity books. It was easier for Xuan because he has got an online account with google classrooms since he was at P1. However, it was a little harder for Cheng because the school hadn’t provided him with the account. The things-to-do list was sent to me daily by the class teacher. I thought I would go into depression soon as I couldn’t bring myself to find the passion in cooking and patience in guiding Cheng. Then, Cheng’s class teacher sent me a login ID saying that his class would list down the school work by using google classroom. It was a relief for me because the kids are happy to keep their hands on laptop and excited with quizzes or games online, besides completing activity books. The next one I would really appreciate is the tuition centre which printed out hardcopy of exercises and took the troubles to send to the kids. It then holds online classes to guide them thru for 2 hours daily. It was the first time we watched them sitting in front of the laptop, listening to the teacher attentively while completing the work.

And for Xin Yi, this is the funny part when her kindergarten decided to start an online class daily. We did not expect any online lesson for kids at her age but it’s the kindergarten’s effort that counts, so Xin Yi has been sitting in front of the laptop everyday too and I have 3 sessions each day via zooms, which I could really laugh myself off and also roll eyes for that. Yes, I’m a super busy mum because hubby is rushing his project at work and he has got no time for us. And I guess the only me-time that I get to get breather is when I leave home for grocery shopping, minus the spike in bills that I have to deal with because I generally buy everything we eat.

Above all that, I must say that it drains me out easily. I do not have extra energy or attention to focus on my work. Thanks goodness, we do not have any online classes organized by the uni right now because once again, I wouldn’t know how to juggle if it really happens. Yet again, if I wish this mco could end soon, it is probably not for the risk that we would expose ourselves to. So stay at home and stay safe!

Headache solved

So we were looking for kindergarten and daycare centre for Xuan and Cheng since theirs were closed down permanently. I feel sorry and sad for it because they both went there since 5yo and 2.5yo. I had never thought Xuan would continue to stay there for daycare before going to school in the afternoon. But the kindergarten was run as home-based and the tuition they offered to primary school children was more like homework coaching so it suited us that we subscribed Xuan. Also, the principle is a kind lady with a few words that always gives children full trust. And not to mention, they were so tolerant with us who had been late everyday. So we were on a lookout. The kindergarten offered Cheng a place at the sister outlet somewhere in another township, together with transport. But they have none for Xuan. It may sound convenient but we have to be really early because transporter will pick Cheng up at 730 at the nanny’s. In the end, we found one that’s to send Cheng to somewhere near the nanny’s. Just as we thought we are almost done with the arrangement, checking out daycare centre for Xuan wasn’t as simple as we thoughts. In fact it is quite sad to see the education has been made too commercialised these days. While I do not really look at the syllabus or methods used for Xuan since he will just be P2 next year, most of the centres offer tuition and are run like centres I attended when I was in secondary which they provide different set of activities books following public school syllabus. Yesterday, we scouted around the area we wanted and finally found one for Xuan. We hope it’s doing good for Xuan because Cheng tested the principle’s patience by dropping her phone on the floor and very patiently, the principle assured him everything’s ok! My boys are just rough as such. So not hoping for an extensive program, we only want them to enjoy the learning process. Having a full time working mum, we have no choice but the kids to bear with us!

Hunting a new learning centre

Upon returning home, we got news that Xuan and Cheng’s kindergarten will be closed down and merged with another branch which is quite a distance to us. No matter how upset we are, this day has come and the job of scouting around a new kindergarten and daycare centre begins immediately. Sometimes I do not understand how parents can or are willing to pay for their children’s education. But everyone is different. There, we made some comparisons to find that the difference can actually fund one adult’s airfare ticket on holiday and we are still thinking whether we can take the bet.

On being kiasu

Xuan got no 3 in his class and there is a prize giving ceremony at the school that allows us to attend and take photos of him. Unfortunately, we have planned our holiday ahead and we won’t make it. He probably is being deprived from going up the stage which I feel slightly guilty. But the father takes it easy! He had never gone up to the stage during his primary school days so that’s fine that we do not have to feel guilty or sorry or whatsoever. The most important thing is character building and the eagerness to learn (which I think I do not have this at all so I’m a salted fish except when it comes to travelling). I always hope my kids to take after their father’s attitude that he is always hungry for knowledge, not because for the career advancement but just because he is eager to learn. If they are going to be kiasu, they must be one that competing against themselves and trying to be better all times rather than competing against others because that’s just too tiring and it won’t make them happy.

On another note, Cheng went for a field trip in Semenyih and managed to answer a question among his peers and got a small aquarium back! He came home and asked for some small fish from nanny to put in the mini aquarium. While I thought he is still mischievous and ignorant, he is slowly picking up and quite a focused boy in things he does!

funny kids

Xuan told us that he was selected by the class teacher to represent his class for Kuiz Ejaan. Then he came home to tell us that he got the 5th and felt he should have done better. He said, "mummy, I couldn’t get the KARTUN correct. I wrote kartoon instead." The father laughed at him because he was just confused. Then this boy was mumbling, "I never get number 1 you know. I want to try that." I have no idea how and why he becomes kiasu. But because of his attitude, Cheng is also developing the same trait. Since I practice spellings with him, Cheng was worried he couldn't score and that he wouldn't be chosen to become a prefect. I said, you don't need to be prefect. Just an ordinary student will do. "No lah, mummy, I want to try to be prefect like ko-ko." So people said big bro or sister sets example for the younger ones is probably true.

Anyway, Xuan has been telling us that he wants to change his surname because the friends always makes fun of him. The friends laugh at him as the pronunciation of Tok is similar to the knocking sound which makes Xuan unhappy. At his school, the friends said his surname is pronounced almost the same as table in Chinese. Hubby and I feel amused indeed, kids nowadays are very playful and creative which hubby had never experienced those himself when he was young.

thank you cards

Xuan was asked to make some appreciation cards to parents and teachers to thank us for what we have done. So his card dedicated to daddy reads, thank you daddy for cooking for me. I love you.

Then, he turned to me and asked, “mummy, what are you good at?” “I’m good at writing. Probably reading, or playing sudoku.” “No mummy, I mean something that you are good at for me... Like daddy cooks for me.” “Oh, ok, there is a lot....... right? I gave birth to you. I breastfed you... errr..... I was good at breastfeeding you.” “It’s ok, mummy. I thank you for sending and picking me up to and from school some days.”

So I showed my family the card Xuan made. Everyone was laughing when they saw him thanking his daddy for cooking for him. They questioned, why not mummy? The teachers at the school might probably ask the same question too. Did his card put me to shame because it appeared that daddy is doing some mum’s jobs? Unfortunately or fortunately, I take it positively. I wasn’t offended at all that my son couldn’t find or notice my sacrifices for him. Maybe he will when he is big, but the fact is, I’m not good at house chores (the father is an ocd). So oh well, I’m spared.

our sons

My two boys constantly challenge my patience and drive me up the wall. While I’m short tempered dealing with them, I feel grateful to have them in my life that they teach me to be a better person. I raise two boys of very different souls who teach me that I can have many approaches to reach the same goal.

The beginning of July signifies that Cheng is going to start his spellings in 3 languages at the kindergarten. Cheng is not as tame as Xuan so the approach of teaching him is also different, although I know his attention and focus can be very good. He will cry and refuse to write if he is forced to. But he can spend a really long time building lego, which previously, he would get angry and destroy the lego when things didn't go his way (when he was younger). Now he has learnt to calm down but still hot tempered when he is tired or sleepy.

Cheng will take shortcuts in doing his things. I don't mean to compare both of them, but if I'm asked to comment, I will say, Xuan follows rules strictly while Cheng breaks the rules. He is a street-smart boy that probably can survive outside the house. I tested his 听写 to find out he never follows the strokes, at all.

So I sat down with the boys and practiced with Cheng for his first 听写. He was asked to write 男, so I said, "didi, you can only close the door after everyone comes in. Chinese writing doesn't allow us to invite guests to get into our house after the door is closed." That’s referring to writing 田 following the correct strokes.
Xuan: Mummy, 廖老师 also said the same thing to my classmate XXX. He simply writes the words without following the strokes. 廖老师 asked XXX, can you come into this class after I lock the door?
Didi: Why must I write? I don't like writing you know. I only want to play.

Ideally, I didn't have to sit down and practice with the boys at home because they have practiced a lot at the daycare. With Cheng, I have to change my routine that's to watch him write because Chinese writings requires some basic. He can't be writing 口by just drawing a square. The bad habit is going to continue if we don't change it right now. So I know why my mum always sat down with us when we were in primary school. It's a lot of hard work. But I guess the hard work today is little compared to add-maths and sciences many moons later. I will pass the baton to the man of theirs who knows everything.

The kids are super funny

Before we got into the plane to go to Bali, parking next to us was an aircraft from Qatar Airways. While waiting in line in the aerobridge, Cheng told his dad, “daddy, I miss Qatar Airways, you know. I think we need to make a trip on Qatar Airways.”

Before we left hotel to go out sightseeing, the father asked Cheng to put on his sandals. “Why are we not putting on sport shoes?” “It’s very warm outside.” “The weather is not cold like Japan? I thought it’s very cold here. I like cold places like Japan, you know.”

Last week on parents-teachers day, Xuan insisted to buy a bottle of non-carbonated drink from the canteen. The drinks that Cheng and he had been eyeing on when he has activity at the school on Saturday. The packaging is colourful with cartoons like panda. And it’s sugar-coated. “Next time, do not simply buy this kind of drinks at the school. I do not know what brand it is and the ingredients are not clear.” “Mummy, Teacher Liaw told us not to 乱乱讲话。My friend bought and he never dies. So it’s safe.”

我要当学长

First few weeks Xuan started P1 at the school, he came home to tell us that he wanted to be a 学长. Something like prefect, but I guess since there is no prefect for P1 and P2 which are the afternoon session, so 学长’s job is almost the same as prefect where those selected will have their roles to play, mostly to look after the students and most importantly, 学长 can summon students (抄名）. The school will pick 学长 among the P1 students before the beginning of second term. He was influenced by a P2 girl who shares the same daycare and transport with him. For the first few weeks, he was bullied by the girl in the bus who pinched and threatened him. Xuan was (probably still is) timid, he confessed that, “usually only good students will be selected to be 学长, I don’t know why JJ was chosen, she is naughty and she bullies me.” “I have to practice my spellings, 听写 and ejaan. I can’t score 0 or else I won’t be selected by the teachers to be 学长.” “Mummy, it’s ok not to score full marks in spellings, 听写 or ejaan. I still have the chance to be 学长.” Now Xuan and the girl are friends who always play together on the way to school or home. And he learns a lot from the peers, both the goods and bads.

Last week was parents-teachers day, so before we went to school, Xuan told me that he was chosen by the teachers to be 学长. He was beaming and if he performs well, he will continue the job next year. While hubby and I feel relieved that Xuan begins to have targets in his life, we also feel that mainly because he wants to enjoy the privilege to summon. He was threatened by the friends who wanted to submit his name to the teachers. So he asked if the teachers would punish him. He is usually tame but quite a bully at home too. The journey ahead is long, it’s inspiring to see how a kid, growing up from a baby to school-going boy who begins to face life lessons, outside the family. Both positive and negative ones. He will learn to be happy and upset and many more things in life that he has no control of. Parenthood has never been easy, we wish everyone well.

Prolonged fever

The past one week was a stressful one for hubby and I because Xuan had a fever which would not subside totally. Just as the medicine took its effect, Xuan would be active and cheerful all the times. But a few hours later, the fever would spike and Xuan became very frail. Then our house became quiet which was very abnormal, so it made hubby and I worried. It was also our first time dealing with prolonged fever like this. So we took him to clinics twice which the second doctor prescribed him some antibiotics. Hubby was reluctant to believe it so we held on and waited. This amazing dad looked after the son while I was at work. On Saturday, Xuan was so tired and he slept all day and only got up after 1 past noon. Thank goodness he is all fine again!! But back at the school where Xuan had been absent for 4 days, he has so much work to complete and the teachers want him to submit tomorrow. Not to mention, he missed out sports day where he was elected to represent his team to race. He was very much looking forward to it, but it's just fated for him not to take part! Poor this little boy but it's good to see him fit again!

Xuan and his transporters

The second week Xuan at the school, we changed his transporter so that we can go home earlier. The arrangement has been so perfect that hubby and I feel it kind of hassle-free. Then Xuan began to ask if we could get back to the first transporter. I wasn’t sensitive enough as I thought Xuan, being a timid boy, doesn't like new stuff and he just got used to the Auntie Leong. One day, he came home and threw a tantrum just because of a petty thing that the father refused to fulfil. Xuan has a very calm temper, we immediately sensed something wrong with him. So the father sat him down, played and talked with him to find that he was punched and pinched by a boy in the van. It happened once. We will not know if the boy is a real bully or he was just playing with Xuan but being rough. But Xuan got angry with him and scolded him, stupid. Since we have been telling the kids that stupid is a nasty word, Xuan dared not to share the stories with us. The real issue is, right after he said stupid to the boy, the boy got unhappy and threatened him to tell his parents. So Xuan got scared and refused to go to school. Poor him. Now, he has become good friend with the boy and would show us where the transporter picks the boy.

Xuan after school

We always say that Xuan by nature is timid, a good follower because he dares not to be different from the rest. Whatever the teachers at the school tell him, he will obey strictly and dare not to go against them. I guess I judge him too fast. Last night, he told me that he doesn’t like his school. He is very tired to attend the afternoon session class because he has to skip his nap. So he asked me about the first and second schools we told him before , whether they provide morning classes. To hear this coming from Xuan, I was surprised. I guess he has been really tired that he goes to bed earlier than he usually does. When he reaches home, he spends most of his time cycling around the house. Oh boy, he grows up too fast that he bathes himself and packs his school bag. He probably doesn’t need me anymore.

Xuan in P1

Kicked off 2018 feeling meh about new routine in life. Our firstborn is officially P1 and he is very cool taking it. Hubby and I are proud of him that he is independent handling his stuff and we have no worry at all. The school was open for the first two days to allow the parents to go in. I told Xuan that I would only send and pick him on the first day after which he will have to survive by asking around. He was ok with that. He listened to the instruction given by the teachers attentively and told me not to disturb. He chased me out too. But the first day coming home, he said I should have stayed during recess because all the parents stayed and guided their kids to buy food at the canteen. I defended myself that, he can buy junks like ice cream from the grocery stores nearby but he needed me to guide him at the canteen? Since it’s once-in-a-life-time experience, I still felt guilty, so I sneaked out from office the second day to see him during recess. He was surprised to see me. So I gave him RM2 to buy fish balls for Cheng and himself. He was very shy and did not know whether he should speak Malay, Chinese or English to place his order. Then I met a parent of his kindergarten friend who talked me into subscribing my son for the monthly meal provided by the canteen. It’s RM50 a month and all Xuan needs to do is to go to his designated seat to have his food. While I was waiting for hubby’s reply, although Xuan is a bread lover, he should not have bread or bun everyday. So I paid without telling Xuan. Coming home, I told Xuan to go to his seat at number 398 from the next day onwards. I was kind of worried about him not finding his seat because I did not show him the place at all. The next day, the father went to peek at him during lunch break and saw him sitting down, eating his food with his best friend. The only thing that we are still cracking our head is the transportation sending him back from school. It’s too late that we have wasted so much time unnecessarily. It makes us consider transferring Xuan to a school nearby so that we would have the quality time we want. But making a new arrangement is very tiring and Xuan starts to have many new friends. I have another fear when all my kids go to school and choose their activities of different time. Surely, we will have to wait longer or perhaps spend half a day at the school. So here it is, when Xuan is P6, Cheng will be P4 and XY will start her P1. Wow, that’s another long way to go.

School holiday

School holiday has just started. Many stay-at-home mums with school-going kids dread about this because one, there won’t be routine of kids going to school or chauffeuring the kids around. Two, hearing the siblings fight at home is just so common that we have to endure with it in order to train our patience. Here I’m wishing hubby best of luck because he will go thru the same next week onwards. He said cherish these moments while the kids are young, the kids will play in his study, enjoying life while watching him work, then they start fighting. While thinking of how he is going to juggle, next year onwards when Xuan starts his P1, I’m gonna take leave and go places with them during the school break. I think we just gotta make it a routine that we will go on a holiday in the year end every year.

Xuan in P1

The results of Primary 1 2018 has finally out and we are disappointed to know that Xuan didn't get to the school we chose. Instead he has to go to another one which is further from our area. Hubby and I don't like the idea of spending too much time on the road because it's stressful and tiring. The location is priority for our convenience, although we will hire a transporter. But now we are contemplating about the choice to stay or appeal for transfer. Xuan has been excited to see the familiar faces at the school. It's another tough choice.